There once
was a man we’ll call husband
A man with a
fantastic life
He had money
and friends and abdominals (not really)
And a
deliciously hot saucy wife
Then one day
his wife changed the contract
She plied
him with beer and wine
She said,
“love, we should have a baby”
She really
did think it was time
Husband was
not really sure
It sounded
like far too much work
But wifey
was being quite fruity
So he took
her to bed with a smirk
He thought
he’d have got a few months worth
Of sexy
times all day and night
But 32 short
seconds later
A baby was
well within sight
The baby was
born in September
A gorgeous
but noisy wee lad
He pooed and
he weed and he grizzled
But on
balance we were very glad
And then
came the kick in the scrotum
The Wife had
a glint in her eye
She said
that she wanted another
And husband
emitted a sigh
Husband said
one child was plenty
A child we
could love and protect
But wife had
control of the matter
With the
offer of more naughty sex
So out came
the beer and vino
And costumes
and undies of lace
And 32 short
seconds later
The second
was cooking at pace
My daughter
was born in the summer
A beautiful
placid wee treat
She didn’t
stay placid for long though
She only
stopped crying to eat
But now they
are both growing bigger
As handsome
and cute as can be
The gallons
of sick is a memory
And life is
all school and TV
So what is
the end of this story?
A story of
days good and bad
The husband
turned into a father
And the
father became Hapless Dad.
This is fantastic!! it made me chuckle all the way through! x
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely and utterly brilliant. I bet this sums up the thoughts of Dad's everywhere! I love it. Thank you so much for linking to Prose for Thought and welcome. Hope to see you link again :) x
ReplyDeleteVery cool - hope you can blog in rhyme all the way through you blogging career!
ReplyDeleteThat's brilliant! I love it :D
ReplyDeleteLove it, very clever. It pretty much happened like that in our house, too ;)
ReplyDeleteThat's really good! Sounds like us actually, although we did it all a third time too :)
ReplyDelete